I am thinking that I will call off the job search and instead ask that employers line up to spit in my face. The effect would be, roughly speaking, the same thing.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
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I used to be the girl all the men wanted to dance with. It's true: Men once enjoyed dancing with elderly women with bunions, facial hair, and breath like a teenage boy's armpit. No longer, though. Thank god. I fucking hate dancing.
2 comments:
Well, there's that whole 'actually pay to get kicked down a flight of stairs' option, too. Most people? Two hun'red dollah. For you? Free.
Naw, why don't you write about how funny the phrase "she has triplets" sounds as an explanation for someone's absence?
"Shit, is it curable?"
"Is it contagious?"
"Does it hurt?"
"I've heard that's going around."
Etc.
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